Pain, Misery and Utter Destruction in your life and why this is a Good thing!

What pain, Misery or Utter Destruction is holding you back?

BTW: there is nothing to buy at all on this blog post so take you guard down :-)

Whatever it is I will show you it is a blessing in disguise and that it is only temporary!

My name is John Pate. I think I can now come clean with the world and talk about my Utter destruction and why this will give you hope.  There is so much to this story I am sure I will not be able to put it all in context, just know I will do my best...

I am going to be candid to show the transformation, so reader beware...

Almost 15 months to the day (todays date is Jan.4th 2012), my world was rocked and completely blew up, a part of me knew it was coming but you never plan for the unexpected bombshells or landmines and the desmise that follows that would stop most (trust me it about did me in). Let me explain:

My beautiful young wife had me locked up on a misdeamnor charge borderline felony, the funny thing is I thought it would be a fine and I would let the dust settle at home and all would go on as we planned, HA, what unfolded is a NightMare!

Over the next few weeks, (I am still in jail mind you) the state started shoveling as much horse crap as they could up with truth or not, by the time Oct. 27th rolled around they had allegiations against me to have me in prison for 150 years, my wife left with all of our possessions and children to Fl. let the house go etc....this is the beginning of my chaos-keep reading!

Finally, on Dec. 11th I was able to get ahold of someone to get bonded out of jail, the very next day, my wife called up my parents and demanded to know why I was out, just like my dad told her, your looking for support and I can't help you the way my son can.  He has been blessed with unprecented wealth in his life and I am sure he will do a much better job than me... that was the last communication at all from her, so I do not even know if she is alive, if my children are ok...surely you can see where this pain is goin, keep readin...

Anyway, I will be honest, I did not have time to grieve in jail (67 days of pure enjoyment, yea right) as that is a sign of weakness or better yet like blood in the water which invites unpleasant behavior from the others that are jailed for good reason.

I was able to determine by Dec. 21st that I had lost it all, my home, my businesses, my partners, friends, family pretty much EVERYONE and EVERYTHING was gone. This was the lowest point of my life and I am ashamed to tell you the next part but I said I wanted to be open, honest and candid with you, so here goes...

By the time New Years Eve 2011 rolled around, I had been with out my family for 87 days, we spent every wakin moment together, did everything together, I mean we were always together for everything, no exceptions etc..., knowing this I decided I could not bare the pain anymore, I was willing to take the coward way out, I ordered a case of wine, went to walmart and bought a bottle of sleeping pills. What happened next has to be a miracle as I am still amazed.

I consumed 5 bottles of wine and took a bottle of sleeping pills figuring if I was done, I was really done...little to my knowledge, I woke up 16hrs. later completely refreshed? How???

I know I have been blessed in the past with tremendous wealth, oppurtunities, connections to die for, why would I be spared after doing this cowardly act of trying to kill myself?  I am still not sure to this day but there is good reason for it...I promise, keep reading

Jan. 3rd 2011, The state tries and tries to indight me on all the charges (little did I know that it was an election year for the sherrif and he needed a big case to win-thanks dude, for the unnecessary push to destroy me)  that would have me sent away for 150 plus years, they had to submit it multiple times to the grand jury and finally after it was all said and done, they indicted me on the lesser charge, my attorney told me it was the catch all, so they did not end up with egg on there face for wasting the State's money...OK, that helps, I said...

Granite I am still missing my children, my wife, despite all the utter ruin I was and had been subjected too, so I decided agaisnt the injunction order to tell my wife I loved her and I forgave her immediately (I am not one to hold a grudge, she knows that) well, my reward was they revoked my bond and through me back in jail...funny how they intentionally waited to 5:30pm on that day to hear my case...the damned banks were closed...hahaha, not really but you get my point.

I realized even though I had been indicted on the lesser charge all the big charges were still just hanging out there, which put me into a tailspin of despair once again...what have I done, I was so motivated, giving, caring etc..and I had become this monster, a work a holic, not spending time with my family...any and all negative statements I could think of, I was really beating myself up at this point!

My wife always said with passion and feeling, "if we were not here you would have it all back, that we (my family) was holding me back from greatness"...well, her declarition or affirmation came true, partly...

Why pain, misery and utter destruction is a blessing in disguise you may ask, I have not forgot...

Here's Why-

You see, what happened to me is a nightmarish hell, I was reliving it over and over with passionate anger, disgust, despair etc...and it was just prolonging the pain I was in...this next part is hard to grasp but if you get it, it will change your life dramatically!

I am not going off on a religious rant here but I started reading the bible and started listening to preachers preach the word...what I discovered, was in short this:

The past is history, The Future is a mystery and the point of power is now!

Just like my wife kept saying "if we were not here you would have it all back, that we (my family) was holding me back from greatness" you and I both can do the same thing but for positive good.

I began to speak powerful affirmations in the present tense:

I am rich

I am free

I am loved

I am confident

I am good looking (no seriously I am, I got it from my dad...he is a stud :-)

What is meant for my harm will be used for my good.

this too shall pass

etc...

There is a lot more, but my point is this, when I took back my power, the depression left, the feelings of this is the end left, all those stupid charges were dropped, I have not had any contact with my wife, children or her role model (her mother) in 15months, well, I got a facebook friend request out of the blue from the "role model" of course my attorneys said do not accept until we see what the angle is, why did she contact me? Could it be that I was saying, I love to hear the voices of my family? who knows?

I mean I only said that about 10,000 times lol...

To make this come to an end, when ever trials, tribulations or holy crap moments hit you, stay calm and be grateful for it knowing that you are being allowed to go through this because the universe knows you are strong and are ready for the next level, keep your power, and your reward will be greater than anything you could hope, think or ask for.

I am truly grateful all this happened to me, it has shown me who my true friends are, business partners and who has my back regardless of the storm that is raging in my life.

For all you naysayers and people who stopped communicating with me, those who will not return my texts, emails or phone calls...I have only one thing to say to you!!!!

I love you and thank you.

I found out yesterday (Jan.3rd 2012) all of this is being dismissed...the lesson I have learned from this whole ordeal is that no matter what, give love and thanks as it could be gone in an instant and your left scratching your head saying what the hell just happened.

If your down, please know it is temporary, you will bounce back, this test is just uncovering a character flaw that needs repair, if your going through hell, don't stop...keep going, as long as you have air in your lungs, your best days are still in front of you...

If it helps, I love you and I know you will pull through and get double for your trouble my friend.

In love,

John Pate



P.S. If you are reading this honey, I love you and our two babies more and more each day, I still would take a bullet for you, I have forgiven you and out of all the people on this planet I said yes to you for a reason! For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, til death do we part...I meant it and still do!  I love you and I am proud of you!